Sunday, 24 November 2013

Stereotypes...



You know how they say the way a question is asked will determine the response? Well I follow this Facebook page and a “Help a sis out” question was posed earlier today: “What do people mean when they say don’t go to the Africans to get your hair braided?” The responses my oh my they ranged from
Not all Africans are like that! Am an African and i can proudly say that i can do some awesome styles and ppl always come to me for their hair so just bc u had an experience with some don't bottle all of us that we are the same they are some black Americans which can cause damage by adding extensions or wigs without be careful and no one says anything about them.”

“All Africans don't braid the same! My daughter got some of the neatest braids and never lost a strand. If you get French braids its always best to have them braid your regular hair for a bit and then add the extensions

“I go to the africans for quality hair braiding you know what tight pulling does to the hair so you TELL them NOT to braid to tight I''ll also say don't put those teeny weeny braids on the edges nor pull them I just don't allow ANYONE to misuse and abuse my head of hair that's strictly on you to ALLOW that harsh treatment they will NEVER KNOW I once told the young lady that there will BE NO SORRY'S time and time again...PERIOD! If there braiding to tight get up and leave from the start.

To
“They charge a lot... They stink (sorry)... They have 10 people braidin ya hair at one time... They braids pull ya hair out to the roots... Maybe any of those?!

“They stink???? Seriously,you stink of delusion. How will you feel when Africans say black women are loud baby mamas with attitude problems and black men are into drugs, self destruction,multiple sex partners and never finish college!!

“They stay to dang pregnant for me. They say you not suppose to let a pregnant woman play in your hair. That would explain why some ppl I know that has went to them, don't have no edges!!!!

And finally
As an African, I understand where the steryotype comes from. It doesn't apply to all but in my experience, sometimes women in these salons talk about you and throw shade for no apparent reason. But I've experienced this in AA businesses as well. There's a long standing feud between Africans from the continent and people of African descent in the diaspora and because I'm somewhere in the middle, I've experienced bad customer svc from both groups. I think the division is pointless because at the end of the day, racists consider ALL black people inferior.

“You have to find the right people to go to. You can't put ALL African braiders in the same box. That's like saying all black women are angry and have attitudes. I've been going to the same two African ladies who are sisters to get my hair braided for the last 3 yrs. I went to an American to get my hair braided, hair was too tight. It all depends on the people that braid your hair...African or not!!!

Well ppl complain abt everythg! Some African woman may braid extremely tight & some may not! The are many black woman who braid extremely tight as well & some who do not! I know many black females (young & old) who walk around with very tight braids (from blacks not the "Africans") with bald headed on each side of there heads & also in there nape arear! But whats crazy is when they do experience balding from tight braiding the still will put those tight braids in their hair & their daughters hair! So, Im not sure why ppl only sat "The Africans braid too tight"! If they braid tighter than from what I have witness with the scalp bulging together & baldheaded on the sides, then thats would be worse than a black woman braiding! Lol!

*sighs* Why can’t black people just get along??? Looking at some of these comments the black race has a long way to go imagine this is only between “Africans” and “blacks” in the North American/Europe Diaspora imagine what would happen when our “people” in Australasia join in this debate! I have a feeling that if the original question had stated “African Braiding Shops” instead of “Africans” the comments would have been a lot less stereotypical, rude etc maybe I am wrong. I am very opinionated and quite frankly couldn’t be bothered to go on a back and forth session by replying to some of the negative comments on that post so I thought I would just blog about it. There is positive criticism and then there is outright rudeness which was exhibited greatly in the comment section of that post.  

I have had my hair braided by black people from the Caribbean and from Africa, had similar experiences with both bad and good. Some Caribbean stylists I swore never to go back to and some I remained a loyal customer the same with the African stylists. Bottom line is if a hairdresser whether he/she is blue, yellow, green from Mars, Jupiter or Pluto is mishandling your hair say something if it means getting up and leaving halfway through do so. Some “Africans” may braid tightly because that is what they know and are used to, African threading anyone? Instead of sitting there and criticising, judging an entire continent because of a few people why not let the change start with you teach them how you want your hair to be braided it doesn’t matter if just one stylist out of ten heeds your request the fact is that you spoke up the journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step.

Just incase anyone is still in the dark Africa is a continent not a country and last I checked officially there were 54 countries (I stand to be corrected on that blame politics) with different languages, customs and food. We come in all shades dark, darker, darkest, light, lighter, lightest and the in betweens we have all textures of hair represented so please if you are one of those who does stop lumping us in the “Africans” category. I know of other races/nationalities where allegedly  the Diaspora born people look down on people from the mother country but the one thing that sticks out is they all present a united front to the rest of the world or community they live in and look out for each other.  Whoever came up with the divide and rule strategy for black people must be really smiling in his grave right now! 

I purposely left out majority of the rude comments because I am not about that giving space on my blog to ignorant people life you can click on the Facebook link at the top and go down the page's timeline to see the said post and comments.

7 comments:

  1. Why can't black people just get along indeed! People are always finding a way to divide!

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  2. The same reason why people in general can't get along. Feeling better than someone else tends to offset the people that you feel inferior to. If everyone was purple with polka dots, were a perfect size 7, with all the clothes and shoes they wanted, the best tasting food they could acquire, with totally identical homes and had the same annual salary in their respective countries so they were healthy and happy in their lives they would find something else to complain about their neighbors for. So and sos yard is a touch lighter than ours. So and sos child got on the bus before ours. It would be something. I'm looking for a good braider now lol. As long as she can hook up a cute style that can withstand wash day and allows me to work out as much as I like I'm good.

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    1. Southern Girl I hear you. I agree people in general can't get along but us as black people seem to be the most divided if we are not throwing shade at each other it's calling each other names and what not. Other races do not seem to have this problem or at least not to the level that is in the black community, at least to us they all seem to get along regardless of the problems they may have within their own communities because that is the image they present to the rest of us perception is everything. We just end up looking stupid fighting each other over the most trivial of things and the worst thing is we do it in public in full glare of everyone and while we are thinking we are all that and a bag of chips everyone else is laughing at us and our foolishness. White and Asian women get perms too but have you ever heard of the team natural and team permed debate amongst them? No it may or may not exist but the point is they don"t trivialize it, it is a non issue to them. I think we as black people need to take the saying "don't hang your dirty linen in public" and own it. If my sister is acting out I or my immediate family may sit her down and talk some sense into her not start discussing her issues with the neighbours and that is what we seem to be doing it's like we derive pleasure from airing our dirty linen in public for everyone to see. There are some African countries that have been stereotyped for some criminal activities now if a person of another race came up to me and mentioned such stereotype I will be sure to school him or her that because a few nationals from said nation indeed have been caught doing those activities that is not reflective of the entire nation or Africans in general and also give him examples of people from other non-African nations who do the same. But imagine if I agreed with said person wholeheartedly based on this stereotype next thing you know he will tell the next person who wants to hear that you see even this other African person agrees with me so it is true of all the people from that nation. The change has to start with us our generation so that it can be passed on to the next.

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    2. Oh and I hope you do end up getting a good braider and make sure to speak out if she is braiding to tight.

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  3. This is shameful. It would be the infamous Willie Lynch, who taught the importance of psychological division among the slaves in order to keep control of them, that's still smiling in his grave at the things we do to ourselves. What's truly sad is that he believed if his rules were followed correctly by slave owners, we would continue to fight among ourselves without their help for 300-1000 years and that's exactly what has happened. Ugh. I hate to see this kind of stuff!

    I actually got my hair braided recently at an African Braiding Salon. I have posts planned all about my hair, of course, but I couldn't decide if I was going to do one solely based on my experience at the salon itself. This just made me decide to do so, for both the good and the bad. Thanks Lydz!

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    1. Thanks Melanie! It is very shameful indeed. 300 -1000 years wow old Willie is sure smiling in his grave right now! I am glad you decided to do the braiding post both the good and bad it is needed. Just like other stylists are now changing their ways thanks to hair bloggers/vloggers I believe the African Braiding Salons with issues will in the long run adapt to changes too if more people create awareness. You may be surprised that some of the ones labelled rude and who braid tightly may not even be aware that they have a problem because no one has called them out on it people just sit in the chair, bear it and complain to everyone else but the braider; that to me is enabling the problem. It just takes a few salons in an area to up their game change their attitude listen to their customers and once word spreads out the others will start doing the same as well otherwise they risk losing business and no business wants a bad reputation. I look forward to reading your post:)

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Thank you for reading...feel free to add a comment, suggestion or question. I am always happy to hear from you! Lydz.